Life

I’m sorry to admit that I’ve been in a kind of a weird funk this week, hence the reason for not updating. We had a lovely quiet long weekend, but it ended on a sad note. I got a call from my best friend, and her mother passed away on Sunday. Mom T had been diagnosed with cancer (two kinds), and emphysema in the latter part of January of this year – four months later she’s gone.

I grieve for my girlfriend and her family. I knew this woman quite well, and will miss her terribly. I am just so tired of grieving the loss of my friend parents.

I sat down on Tuesday and wrote a list of all the people that are around me who have lost a parent, or Grandparent since my mom passed away in August. Can you guess the number I came up with? 20! That isn’t including the 7 other people from my church community who passed away that were friends or acquaintances.

I know it sounds morbid to sit down and create such a list, but I wanted to try to pinpoint some of the heaviness that I’ve been feeling. Once I’d actually began to analyze the list, a little light bulb flashed in my brain and gave great explanation into my heart and the sorrow felt.

Some of these passings are joyous reunion’s with our Lord, but some – like my mom – are not, and I wonder if I couldn’t have done more, said more, acted more. But I can’t go there right now.

So here I sit knowing that life is a cycle. Death is a guaranteed thing. But does it always have to hit so close to home and for so many? Can’t we just string them out a little further apart? Can I stop grieving for just one moment?

Who will be next?